No, you don’t have a migraine, not having a stroke, no aneurysm, thank goodness! Yet, you do have a serious problem. It’s the women’s dilemma of mental overload. It is the mental burden for working women that includes juggling children and households. We are not talking about the actual physical labor of taking care of children, shopping, cleaning, etc., that physical work is visible and exhausting. However, the invisible mental overload can be even more destructive. Time management gurus usually talk about planning, prioritizing, time blocking etc., to be able to focus more effectively on work. We talk less often about the mental overload that limits women’s careers. What if you cannot focus at work because you are worrying about scheduling vet appointments, children’s parent/teacher conferences, and buying new clothes for your child? It’s bound to take a hit on your career. This mental overload for women is significant. It drains focus, creativity, problem solving and work satisfaction.
Below is an article recently published by the Most Powerful Women Daily Newsletter from Fortune, with Emma Hinchliffe on December 20, 2024. It is captured verbatim to not miss any insightful information.
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Ana Catalano Weeks, a senior lecturer in comparative politics at the University of Bath who often studies gender and society, has two new research papers that study the impact of the mental load on women. The first, published with University of Melbourne sociology professor Leah Ruppanner in the Journal of Marriage and Family, follows parents in the U.S. and found that mothers carry, on average, 71% of the mental load. This includes the unseen work that precedes physical work: noticing that the faucet is leaking and must be repaired, remembering when to schedule a doctor’s appointment or cut the kids’ nails, or keeping track of who to give gifts to each holiday season.
Catalano Weeks’ research is among the first to quantitatively, rather than qualitatively, study this labor. “This is work that goes on in people’s heads, so it’s not really possible to observe it,” she explains — compared to typical measures of physical labor like time-use surveys.
So why do women get stuck doing the overwhelming majority of this work? Like with the physical labor of housework, it’s a way of “performing gender,” the researchers found. “The work itself isn’t visible, but the implications of it are,” Catalano Weeks says. If parents don’t remember that it’s Christmas sweater day at school or that the kids are outgrowing their shoes, the mom is typically the one who internalizes that lapse.
Which brings us to Catalano Weeks’ second study: the impact of all this labor on women’s roles in public life through a study of working parents in the U.K. The research, accepted by the British Journal of Political Science but not yet published, finds some of the first causal evidence between the mental load and women’s participation in the workforce and political life. It’s not that women don’t have enough time, but that the cognitive load takes up more space in their minds and “crowds out” the ability or desire to take on additional responsibility at work. Men, who more often are able to forget about the never-ending work of managing a home and family, don’t see that phenomenon to the same degree.
What’s unique about the mental load is the way it cuts across class and privilege. Unlike physical household labor like chores, it’s near impossible to outsource the entire mental load; even for the wealthiest couples who hire a household manager or equivalent staffer to handle much of this work, someone would still carry the mental load of managing that person.
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Does this sound like you? This is a topic that I have addressed in keynotes, training, and with individual clients for many years. Here is an activity I conduct at corporate training events that always causes laughter, sometimes tears, and nods of recognition:
Two female volunteers pretend to be watching a football game, and I become a journalist interviewing them. One volunteer reacts as a female and the other reacts as a male. I ask the female “What are you thinking about right now?” She often responds, “I am worried that the sitter is actually paying attention to my twins, if I remembered to get out their pajamas, and if my presentation at work tomorrow needs to be tweaked.” When I ask the “male”, he responds, “Is Burrow going to be sacked on this play?” This could easily be reversed asking women what they are thinking about when they are at their work desk. You can see the potential challenge of focus, productivity, and career advancement.
If your career is floundering because of this mental overload, you are not alone. This is an issue often discussed, processed, and managed with my individual clients. It CAN be changed. If you are ready to tackle this issue and need guidance, let’s talk. We can do a complimentary 45-minute telephone consultation. Email Kay@highheeledsuccess.com or call 513-561-4288 to schedule.