Managing a Hostile Work Environment

There are few topics that get more polarized responses from each gender than sexual harassment.  Never in my wildest nightmare did I expect in 2011 to be talking about this issue in the same polarized way as we are discussing the Herman Cain allegations. When I first entered the workforce the terms: “Honey”, “Girl”, and “Baby” were common references to women.  It was standard fare for men to expect “perks” from women for the crumbs that were thrown on the table of the workplace.  Then the term sexual harassment didn’t even exist.  The bad behavior of males at work was just the way it was.  Shoot, we weren’t all that very far away from a time when my grandmother could not even vote.

Fast forward to 2011 and here we go still.  Entitlement is an ugly thing.  How will we stem the tide of male entitlement?  Let’s look at two “how to” thoughts.  One of these is certainly at your discretion, the other might be.

What do you normally do when someone oversteps a boundary with you?  Do you in very clear words telegraph the line has been crossed?  If a colleague comes into your office and begins that put his paws on the items on your desk what do you say?  “That’s private please don’t mess with my stuff!”  Are you just and clear and forceful when it comes to unwanted comments or touches?  Isn’t it interesting that many women won’t hesitate to say “don’t touch my stuff” but balks at saying “don’t touch me.”  Don’t get me wrong, I am NOT blaming you for men’s bad behavior but somehow we have to be part of the solution.  It takes courage to state our boundaries but that pales in comparison to the courage that it takes to file a sexual harassment claim.  Your words, your steely stare, and your unequivocal tone are all part of the solution.

If you are a parent, grandparent, or teacher what an opportunity you have.  Today is the day to be setting a new standard for our sons and daughters.  How effective are you in conveying where the rights of girls begin and where the rights of boys end?  Males didn’t learn entitlement their first day on the job did they?  We learn entitlement from the day we are born.  Have the courage to help create a child who understands the rights of others.  Until next time, have courage and be part of the solution.

©Copyright 2011.  Kay Fittes.  All Rights Reserved.